All Points Bulletin issued for missing SLANT C.E.O.

Have you seen this man?That's right people — Christopher has gone MIA. Was it an alien abduction?  Is he practicing his magic disappearing act?  Or, is it simply a long-planned and much needed out-of-state vacation?  

"At this point, we are unsure of his whereabouts," confirmed SLANT Voice of Reason, Mandy Denaux.  "He was muttering something as I left on Friday, but all I heard was 'blah-blah...New York City...', so who knows."  He was last seen wearing a pair of designer jeans and a pink shirt (otherwise known as his uniform), as well as his man-purse computer bag.

Daily disco ball parties vigils will be held until his return.

Comments

[Will]

I call dibs on his stapler.

[mandy]

I'm so confused...if Pher's not here, where is the Celine Dion music coming from?

[Ernest]

Could he be on the Appalachian Trail?

[Craig]

Yeah - the Appalachian Trail in Argentina.

[Lindsey]

Argentina?? What!?! He said he was going to meet me in New York!

Just kidding - I kidnapped him and he is currently heavily sedated awaiting our flight.

[Mimi]

he told me he just wanted his mama and was coming home for some TLC... only problem is, that was 6 years ago (about the same tie he was thinking of that marriage thing).
if you find him, tell him I still love him and I'm still here wishing he was on my porch rockin' with me

[shane]

disco ball will rotate at half speed in our office until Pher's return as "My Heart Will Go On" plays softly in the background.